1.20.2011

10 Minutes - Pictures of Cactus

Hi. It's Joe.

I'm a songwriter.

My stage name is Cactus Joe.

The way I got this name is not particularly cool or interesting.

While I do have a penchant for things "American Southwest," that is not the basis for my nickname.

In essence, the reason I carry this moniker has to do with the fact that I do not have a green thumb when it comes to house plants.

I have a tendency to forget to water them.

As such, the house plants that do well in my house are cacti.

I don't even have that many cacti in my house. But at one time, I had enough that it was notable.

And the person who noted it was one of my drummers that I was playing with at the time.

He had a penchant for nicknames, and he attached the nickname "Cactus Joe" to me, and started referring to me as Cactus Joe publicly.

Well, the name took. It took a long time to take with me, actually, though I now hesitantly embrace it. But it took really fast with most other people, and today I am no longer called "Joe" by many people, but rather "Cactus."

A few people have even taken to calling me "Cacti," the plural of cactus. I'm not sure why this is, other than it seems to be a nickname derived from the original nickname, a variation on the theme. Clearly, I do not resemble a field of cactuses. I am still just one person, not yet cloned. Even if I had a clone, I am sure we would seldom be seen publicly together.

I think if I ever had a child, I would want it to be an actual clone of myself. This is not because I am vain. It is because I would like to give the clone of myself a better upbringing than I had, in hopes of producing an "Uber Cactus" someday. Not that my upbringing was poor. It was quite good, and I did end up being a fairly super human example of a human specimen, at least with regard to my musicianship. But there is always room for improvement.

Then again, I do have a short attention span, so maybe I wouldn't be the best role model for my cloned offspring. Plus, what woman would want to carry my embryonic clone around until it had gestated amply enough to fend for itself outside the womb?

Time.

1. Make Your Own Business Cards.

2. Gentle Leader Head Collar for Dogs.

3. How to Become a Songwriter.

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