10 Minutes - Chicken Cattiatore a la Da Vinci

Hi. It's Joe.

I don't speak Italian.

But Leonardo da Vinci does, and he is speaking it very fast as he makes chicken cattiatore in my kitchen.

With much signing and chicken dancing, he was able to communicate his need for chicken (in Italian this sounds like "polo" and it is hilarious to watch a man say "polo" while flapping chicken wings, I don't know why). I had just been grocery shopping, so I had some boneless chicken breasts, which he quite admired.

At first I didn't know what he meant by "foongee," but after I opened my fridge for him, he pointed at the mushrooms and then I smacked myself, since he was saying "fungi," only in Italian this means mushrooms. I thought he was swearing at me. But that's a slightly different word.

The "fareena" (flour) was a more difficult translation since I don't keep that in the fridge, but the word for "pasta" is the same in both languages and eventually we ended up at the cupboard with the lazy susan where I keep the non-perishables, and he grabbed the sack of whole wheat flour.

Surprisingly, I knew right away what "olio d'oliva" and "vino" were, and once he had those items in hand, and a large skillet, he was off and cooking.

At one point he seemed consternated, like he had forgotten something, and motioned at me, repeating "teemo, teemo!" I assumed he meant "time" and pointed at the clock on the stove. "No, no, no," he admonished. "Teemo! Lee erba, teemo!"

Then I got it, he wanted the herb thyme ("l'erba timo"). Luckily, I had some.

Authentic Italian old school chicken cattiatore is fucking delicious.



sparx said...

Either this is an exercise in creative writing - in which case, keep it up! or... what is the name of your new supplement?

Joe L. said...

It is part creative writing and part having fun with the Google translation tool. Ha ha ha. I should have a Leonardo post every few days. Tonight I am going to take him to see a band in Madison, so we'll see what he thinks of that! Can't understand a word he says, but he writes a lot of stuff down in his leather bound note pad. Very intrigued by the kitchen appliances and I had to stop him from taking apart the toaster...

sparx said...

Damn. I was secretly hoping this was really an herbally induced hallucination.

Joe L. said...

Oh yeah that too. Da Vinci had this awesome pot...laced with belladonna. We were flying.